Friday, June 10, 2011

Bitter-Sweet

This precious 'newborn' time is winding down. My 'baby' is a year old now! She's learning to walk...she says "Da-da, puppy, duck and kak-kak (quack quack :) Yes, she loves her toy duck :)
But the biggest way I know that she's growing up is because we are almost done with nursing. She's drinking big girl milk out of a big girl cup now, and doing just fine with it. Her Mama is happy.....and sad. Just a few more days of nursing before bed-time, and then we'll be....*sob*......all done!
I'll miss cuddling with her as she snuggles up. Yes, we cuddle while drinking the bottle before nap-time, but it's just not the same. I know not every Mama chooses to nurse, and that's perfectly fine. But for me and my babies....I'm so glad it worked out.
It was a pain sometimes.....always scheduling your day around when the baby needs to nurse. Not being able to teach Sunday School or help out much at church for a whole year because "the baby needs me during that time" It was also difficult to go anywhere....I could never be away from her for more than a couple of hours. And so, it had it's difficulties.
But, it was worth it. Obviously, right? I mean, when I've chosen to nurse four babies in a row.....the benefits out-weighed the aggravations without a question!
To sit there, for long amounts of time, resting and snuggling my baby, was one of the best ways that we 'bonded' this past year. To watch her sweet little eyes doze off to sleep as she nursed, to feel the warmth of her body against mine, to rub her soft brown hair.....it was a blessing.
From the moment they first handed her to me and she started nursing, I was in love. And for the whole past year, my life has been totally wrapped up in this little being....in sitting down to fill her tummy every few hours.
But now, we're almost done. And it has to be that way. She can't stay an infant forever, and I wouldn't want her to! But part of me aches....as much as I'll enjoy the 'freedom' of being done, I'll also miss it as well.
My baby is done nursing. Tears fill my eyes through the day as I think of it. But my huband told me last night "Look what a great job you did! She's healthy, she's smart....and it's because of all of your dedication over the past year"
Yes, I may be 'done' nursing her, but she'll always be the proof of all of my efforts and a 'job well done' :) I am SO in love with that girl! :)






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