Wednesday, May 06, 2009

The 'real' me

I was talking to my mom the other day, practically begging her to watch the kids for me for an afternoon so I could have a date with Joel. "I need OUT" My mom's reply? "Wow, and you seemed to have it all together on your blog!" LOL. She was joking of course, because she knows me too well for that. But I understood her point. Blogs tend to be nice ways of keeping everybody updated---but sometimes, we forget to post the real us. You know, like after you're first married and your husband sees what your hair looks like first thing in the morning and says "Oh......" :)
Anyway, it's been a tough week, and here are a few pieces of the 'real' me that I've been struggling with this week--

  • I hate getting up early. Let me repeat that. I. Hate. Getting. Up. Early! Now, let me explain. 6:30 or 7:00 would be perfect for me. Even six would be feasible. But, to make it up before my kids and have any amount of decent quiet time, that alarm has to go off before 6:00-- like, 5:30, and I HATE it! As much as I try to be a morning person, and I try to encourage you all on here to have early morning devotions---let me just be honest---I hate getting up early. The really annoying part is, there is NO other option. I've tried sleeping later and trying to squeeze my devotions in another part of the day---and it just doesn't work. For one thing, my day just gets too crowded and busy with the kids. For another, I LIKE having them first thing in the morning---but why, oh WHY can't we wait until it's actually morning, and not 'really, really late at night??' Six hours of sleep just isn't cutting it for me, and my body is starting to complain--need...more....sleep...... Why not just go to bed earlier, you ask? Oh, I see, you've never had kids!

  • I feel like I can't keep my house clean. Seriously. I clean one room, and then I move on to the next. When I turn around, the kids have made a mess in the room that I just finished cleaning! It's not clean anymore! And nobody even got to see it for the whole, oh say, five minutes that it was actually clean! I take Joel to the room and say "See this room? It was clean earlier today...just so you know." So does what I do matter?? Sometimes I wonder.....

  • I feel like sometimes I work hard at things just to have them 'undone'. For instance, a few months ago, Joel and I spent several hours...no, days.....organizing five years worth of pictures into chronological order, and putting them in albums. Today, Eli dumped a whole album out and messed up my chronological order. WHY?? I don't know. *sigh*

  • And finally, as much as I posted a nice, positive 'Happy Birthday Eli' post yesterday, that's not at all how I saw it. Oh, he had a blast, but---I spent all weekend planning his party to have with his grandparents, aunts and uncles and cousins---which, for Joel and my family, equals approximately 24 people. So, I spent hours on Saturday walking through WalMart buying 32 hotdogs, hotdog buns, cupcake mix, cupcake decorating icing and supplies, party hats and plates, a huge tub of icecream, a bunch of chips, a watermelon we'll never be able to eat...the list goes on. But it was okay, because Eli was going to have a fun party. And THEN, he wakes up sick the morning of the party! We had to cancel the whole thing. Now, I've got 32 hotdogs frozen in my freezer, along with 25 cupcakes, 32 hotdog buns, and...I'm going to get fat because I really like the huge tub of strawberry icecream!! ;)

SO ..there you go. You've probably never heard me rant and rave so much on here. Just been one of those weeks. I think I may have to drive me and the kids out to Pilot tomorrow and pick up some kind of fancy coffee----my week is just screaming "Help me!", and coffee might do the trick :) In the meantime, that buzzing alarm is getting closer and closer, so...goodnight!

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Jaime,
Come on, don't hold back, just tell us how your week really went :)

Do I need to rescue my oldest grandson? We can help with the watermelon, by the way.
I do have to go sew curtains tomorrow....how I wish I could hang with my darling, sweet, well-behaved grandbabies who are so misunderstood by their mother. If they can survive till Friday, they're mine!
Mumz

Chuck said...

martha martha...

don't set the alarm
ask Him to wake you up, it is so much more peaceful and inviting and it works..actually He works

Anonymous said...

HEY! I never said that about your beautiful hair! :)

You're great love... but some days are like that, even in Australia. :)

- Joel

Elizabeth said...

Sounds like some nice and encouraging advice and support from your family and friends (the notes above). More importantly, its good that you know you can share how you feel sometimes. Everyone has to vent!!! I of all people don't know what it's really like to be a mom BUT I do see how hard you and my other married friends work to raise your children well and keep a nice house. All of those little things that you are doing that get undone by the end of the day...!! God sees them and to Him they mean A LOT :) (sorry that sounded very cliche but it's true!)

Love you and hope you get a really really REALLY needed break (and sleep) soon!! :)

Elizabeth

Sharon said...

Hello there MOM!

Jaime..do me a big favor and don't sweat the cleaning. When I think back to how I had a day to clean each room and just continually did that from week to week with my three just running around and destroying my work....ahhhhhhh!!! I know how you are feeling. Now that I am older and they are all grown the "dust bunnies" are still here and I would rather have the kids.
I like the comment to let the Lord wake you up. Actually, Dave and I are not setting an alarm anymore, much, and he still wakes up in time to go to work. 8 hours of sleep is more important than 5AM!! God will provide a time for you and He to connect.... Keep up the wonderful work you are doing.. You have a beautiful family Jaime. :)

Love ya,
Sharon (aka Elizabeth's MOM )

Adam and Jen said...

It's good to just "get it all out". And...no one will fault you for it at all. Anytime you are having a rough week, just remember the time that I dumped you, knees first into Grandma Carol's closet and that will cheer you right up! :) Hehe. Don't ever be hesitant to spill your beans on here, blogs are good for that! I hope you have a great day today!

Appletree said...

I loved this post, which might be surprising. But this felt like getting a lot more of you.

See, I have two best friends - both with kids - and I love having them for friends, because we share all the little or big exhausting parts of life, too.

And sometimes it's this moment of pure relief (wow, they are no superwomen, too) which makes us come the closest.

So welcome in my non-superwoman club - it's great to know you :-)

Appletree said...

Ha, and your Mom's comment was splendid! ;-D

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